maverick's daily dose

Ups and downs

2009-10-20T02:15:00.002+08:00

Been working like crazy for the past few days and everything has gone well since i started working in events.think i am really cut out for this job as i really enjoy it and meeting new people.Especially when people tells me they enjoy working with me i feel so honoured. While work has been going well some other things have not been going well.I really dunno why i am such a failure in this aspect but it seems that i will fail in this forever.It's been like dat all the way.I am so tired and exhausted to even try again.Odds are always working against me so i guess i be alone forever? Probably that's what god has planned for me. Probably he wants me to work and work to make up for my mistakes i have done in the past to repay my family den he will arrange someone for me.Trying not to get emo when i drink but its inevitable..i am really so tired..

Emo shit

2009-10-15T05:04:00.001+08:00

Emo shit today i just dunno why...nobody will know..

PISSED

2009-10-13T03:13:00.004+08:00

Picturs were taken on saturday i think and it turn out to be great!!! Although i think my pic ugly but sharon say its nice so i am happy!! haha..Just heard from my friend that my fucking ex colleague been talking so much bad things bout me even after i left the company.she is the biggest bitch i have ever seen and she thinks she is perfect but in fact she is the biggest cunning fox ever!!! I know no point to get so worked up over her but i am so pissed.Hope she will get her retribution soon. Went down to pub today and enjoyed myself today.But pity sleeping beauty a.k.a sharon (lol) not there if not will be better haha. Think she is still in her dreamland now.I had the weirdest dream this afternoon but i shall not elaborate.Just very strange i will have this kind of dream and somehow i feel sad and happy at the same time because of some reasons from the dream.Hope some things in the dream will come true in time to come and of cuz the bad things all don't come. got to have an early day tomorrow working and hope that it will go well!! Still waiting for miss emiko,miss piggy,miss retard,and many names a.k.a sharon LOL to come online but think let her sleep ba. Good night everyone.tomorrow will be a better day!!

Feeling Lost

2009-10-11T23:15:00.003+08:00

Stayed at home the whole day playing texas on facebook and watching movie..suddenly have this feeling of emptiness inside me and i dunno what is the cause of it..I have to try to maintain my positive attitude if not i will fall again.Please someone help me!!! Yesterday was my first assignment and bloody hell already cocked up.The 2 girls who were supposed to turn up put me aeroplane and i made frantic phone calls for help.Luckily Steff was able to find another 2 replacement and things went well although we were late..Hope this will be the first or the last time anything like that happens...After work went to pub to wish boon happy birthday and drank abit only.Don't really have the mood to enjoy yesterday and i seriously dunno what's the reason.Anyway just glad Sharon made effort to make me not so sians lol . Reached home and chatted with her till around 6am in the morning and went to sleep already.Hope everything will be well for me all the way!!!

Good day!!

2009-10-10T04:05:00.001+08:00

Had a very good day today!! Just started on my new job today as an event coordinator.Dunno if i spell it correctly as i am drunk. Finish a long day of finding girls for my event tomorrow as my friend is throwing me jobs right away!! Dunno why she trust me so much but i will not disappoint her.Finally i have a proper job and i am not slacking!!!! This calls for a celebration!! Went down to pub after work and drank quite alot with my friends.Hope tomorrow everything will go smoothly
and i will accomplish my first assignment.Wish me good luck guys!!!

Puzzled

2009-10-07T03:29:00.003+08:00

Had a very boring day form the time i woke up all the way till 6.30pm.Meet Xiao yi and leyln with botak for dinner beside the pub and went to play texas at the lan shop beside the pub.I dunno why but someone seems upset today and for some reason i feel uneasy also..because i always see her so happy and bubbly but today she seem to be bothered by something.I asked her but she dun say so i cant do anything also.Just somehow quite affected that she is upset bout something or just mood swing.I also swing with her haha.. Tomorrow got to go clubbing with Raymond and my brother.hope that my brother's court case on thursday will be fine as i am damn worried but i dunno how to tell him i am so worried bout him.I just dunno how to express myself.I wonder when will the day come when i can just tell my family i love them.But the time seem so far away as its been like this for the past 8 years...Hope one day i can do it.

If only i could turn back time

2009-10-04T04:07:00.006+08:00

Just back from Orange and can't get to sleep.My sleeping timings are totally opposite as i think Sharon gave me her virus.Drank quite abit today but still feeling fine.Saw some photos of the time when i was in army and memories began to flood into my mind.Although it was the most "xiong" time but it was truly the best time of my life.
Going through shit training and everything in the army with your friends are the things that Singaporean guys will never forget ever.

This 2 pictures were taken when i went to Thailand for army training.Miss those days when i am so slim LOL. But anyway really so fun to train overseas and when we reach to the top of a mountain the view was magnificent.You can never do this in normal civilian life.Really miss my army friends but we rarely contact each other.How i wish i can turn back time to go back to that period of time.Another day has passed and yet i am still doing nothing.Feeling quite lousy at times but luckily there are people around me to cheer me up.People like Raymond,Xiao yi,Lelyn and the person who keep scolding me retarded.You know who you are hor Sharon.OOPS.Paiseh i said out your name.Muahahahahahaa.OK jokes aside.I made this promise to myself.by the end of OCT i must find a job.I have slacked for long enough and if i keep going on i am afraid i will become very lazy..Hope GOD will show me a way out soon.CIAOZ!!

Unsure what i am gonna do

2009-10-03T17:35:00.002+08:00

Had a pretty bad day yesterday as i had to go to Tanglin police station for some matters. After that went down to pub and got to look after my drunk friend.Really dunno how to make it clear to her that we are just friends but yet she keeps getting the wrong idea.Then shocked when sharon cried suddenly so sharon u owe me 2 times of shock liao.Next time my turn to shock you haha.Should be going down to the pub today again as it's darren's birthday.Been thinking alot the past few days bout my life and what i wanna do.Still trying to look for a decent job and stop wasting my life like that.Hope that i can get a good job soon.

Bad day

2009-10-01T01:47:00.002+08:00

Very very tired today as never had a good night sleep last night. Plagued with troubles here and there and started to feel like shit again.Really dun understand why my life has been so complicated for the past 3 years.I know i did mistakes but i think i suffered for too long already.Hope god will pave a way for me soon to fully excel and not let people down down on me ever again..Thanks to those who stood by me and i really appreciate it.U guys are my true friends..

Boring day

2009-09-28T02:56:00.002+08:00

Very bored today as i was home the whole day staring at my computer.But luckily went down to the pub at 8 plus as there was no manpower and just to see if i can help out.
but the crowd is bad today because i think all stay home to watch F1.upon reaching the pub i watch F1 with melvin inside the room and i nearly fall asleep as its so boring!!!
Never understand why people enjoy watching F1...Sharon came down to look for me and as usual she was late lol but ok la.No choice as its F1 day and everywhere is packed like hell so no taxis.Never drink much today cuz no mood but sang quite a number of songs.
Still trying to train my voice to be better as i think i wanna go join whatever competition they have coming up.Hope i have courage when it comes.Still lacking greatly of confidence.Gonna be another drinking session tomorrow and i am waiting for it!! Drink and sing!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

I AM BACK

2009-09-27T05:57:00.002+08:00

Not blogging for 6 months and finally i decide to start again.nothing better to do.
Well this past 6 months has been like a dream.I had very very bad moments and some good ones though.But one thing i am most happy about is that my troubles are finally almost over.I was terminated by my company for some reason and i am currently jobless.
Been slacking for the past 2 weeks plus and its getting bored.i have been spending alot of time at my fren's pub and been drinking like hell.i also stopped soccer for quite sometime already and i better get back soon to get back in shape.
Will update soon bout more stuff and its a brand new start!!

Judgement day soon.

2009-03-22T17:14:00.002+08:00

Went out with Steff and Eva yesterday for some partying and down a couple of drinks.
Suddenly realised that i have known Eva for 4 long years and how much has she grown.
Glad for her that she is a model now and hope everything will be gd for her.
Zirca is the worst club i have ever been and i can predict it will not last long.
From the moment we went in we felt cheated already.How can they expect to beat the others when the place is so small? It looks like some sleazy kind of place though.
But the music is good one thing for sure.Hope the DJ will move into zouk instead.

After this weekend,my life is gonna change drastically.Reasons untold and no one to know.Its my own decision and a really bad one. But its too late.Tired of giving myself excuses and reasons.Its all self consoling.Got to say sorry to my family and friends.Been a heavy burden to u guys and don't worry no longer gonna have all this nonsense.Hope i will be forgiven for my sins.Really hope so.

End of the world?

2009-03-11T02:56:00.004+08:00

Been doing alot of youtubing this few days and came across this rather shocking video. It says that in 3 different religions there were people who predicted that
the end of the world will be in December 21 2012. Those were people from the past who had correctly predicted most of the things which happen few thousand years later.
Even the modern technology points to the possiblity that it might be true as a machine which was built to predict future stock markets also caculated that doomsday
will happen on the date mentioned above. Kind of scary huh? Starting from today we only have 3 more years to live.They actualyl predicted that there will be a major shift in the 2 poles which will create insane climate changes in all parts of the world.For example it might snow in Singapore! Well hollywood has already made a movie out of it (The Day After Tomorrow) and maybe thats a way they use to try to hint us? Well the future is unknown and strangely, i cant wait for that date to come.

Never give up

2009-02-27T18:44:00.003+08:00

Went for a course today and Irene Ang(Rosie from Phua Chu Kang) was a damn great trainer.She was not boring at all and i really enjoyed the course. Anyway at the end
of the course she showed us this video which i think its very very inspirational but sad. It shows this man without any limbs giving a talk in a school and he sends such a strong msg.Just wanna share it with everyone i know and moral of the story never give up!

P.S. Watch the video above to understand more. Video courtesy from youtube.

I did it again

2009-02-23T02:31:00.002+08:00

Never try to cover a hole with another. Its all fated. Did a damn stupid thing and i truely believe now its not meant to be. I shall not elaborate further on what i did but i have to stop before i go back deeper again. Got to live life in a honest way. Been worrying about too many stuff and my body has grown weaker i guess. I will fall sick damn easily nowadays and its not gonna reflect good on my attendance at work. People might think i chao keng but i don't give a damn.

Time to really reflect what i want in life already. i am 25 this year but still not much achievement in life. Got to buck up and got to build my future so that i will not starve later on. Been having too much fun and other nonsense and time to wake up. This is not the way or i will die in the future.
My manager always ask me what i want to do and i cant answer her always cuz i seriously don't know what i want to do and how to plan for the future. I am always a bad planner and i want to change to be a good planner. I always have a weak mind and not enough determination to do what i want. I got to change that if not defintely gonna suffer. Hope i can achieve that and prove it to people around me. Got to do it!

What is love?

2009-02-13T02:25:00.003+08:00

Never understood the meaning of love throughout my life. Been through countless relationships but failing eventually. Is it really me? Or its just fated to be this way? I am really puzzled. Hope the almighty one can enlighten me on this as i am like a lost sheep trying to find its way to the lush green valleys of awakening.

Great pictures

2009-02-09T23:13:00.008+08:00

z Had a long day at work and went to meet up with my friend for coffee after
that. Reached home den rainnie sent me some great pics that she took. They
were beautiful night scenes of the Esplanade and the Singapore Flyer. The moon was also in the perfect position in the background.

Looks like an advertisement promoting the Esplanade?

They should use this picture for the next F1 advertisement.

The Merlion.

Still waiting for the chance to go to Singapore Flyer.

Another great shot with the moon behind the building.

Beautiful pictures? Next time i will take better ones. Whahahaha!!!!!!! Tomorrow off day again and after that will be working straight all the way till next weekend then off. Tired!! Valentine's day coming and gonna be lonely once again but well i guess i am pretty much used to it. I got a curse i supposed. Never celebrated before. Anyway wishing everyone advanced Happy Valentine's Day!!

i need a break

2009-02-05T23:06:00.002+08:00

I think its time for me to take a short break overseas. Been feeling damn tired lately and its to the extent that i feel my energy completely drained out! Although its been damn free at work this past 2 weeks but i still feel tired haha. Quite pissed off when i recieved the news that we will get our bonus half in cash and half in vouchers. What the hell? The security at my work place was commenting if the vouchers can be used to pay bills and other stuff but how to? Extremely disappointed that the bonus will turn out this way but its not finalised yet. So i am still praying for the best. Ben asked me if i am interested to go to bangkok during march and april and of cuz i am interested. I need a change of environment for a few days,breathe of fresh air and other stuff.

Discovered i have 29 days of leave to clear for this year which i think is hell of alot. Got to make some arrangements to clear asap as i don't think i have the chance to do that after june which is always the busy periods. I seriously need a long break. i feel so jaded. Taiwan or Tailand here i come!! Hope to be able to go to taiwan but its abit expensive. Well too bad i am not borned with silver spoon in mouth.So will be saving up as much as possible to go taiwan. My 5 dream destinations for holidays are Japan,Spain,Uk,Taiwan and lastly Italy. I love to enjoy the exotic scenary of these countries and take plenty of photos. Shopping is definitely out of the question as i hate that. So just strive towards my goal of going to all of them one day i hope. Holidays here i come!!

Tired

2009-02-02T02:05:00.002+08:00

Had quite a long day today. Woke up at 9 to go to work and i was damn tired. Reason being my grandma fell yesterday on the way home from dinner with her frens and had a very deep cut on
her hand. Waited for her to come back from hospital and that was like 5am. Luckily she is fine hope god will look after her.
Went to play soccer directly after work at victoria school and we got a 3-1 victory today! Courtesy of goals from Ak leon Zad and Shaun. I personally feel we are improving slowly and we will continue doing so. Came home and made dinner for myself den fell asleep while watching Tv.
Woke up at 12.30am and was like omg i am working early tml and i cfm cant sleep after that nap so i went to ben house for some beer and meanwhile watched the liverpool game. Just reached home not long ago and i don't feel sleepy yet die la~ Hope i will not be late tomorrow for work.
Been trying to improve myself at work to prove some people wrong and i shall perservere no matter what happens. Time to show the world what i am made of.

GONG XI FA CAI

2009-01-28T11:59:00.003+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year!! Time flies and its new year time again. Time to do visiting and collect angbaos!! I had a pretty gd reunion dinner with my family and i went to bulldog for drinks with raymond. He is a crazy person. He ordered a bottle of martell and we finished it within 2 hours. We really have to control our drinking. I don't wanna die young. First day of new year,i went to my maternal grandma house to visit her . I think i only see her like once a year and thats a very bad thing. I miss her and her cooking. It's heavenly!!She looks very old and frail now but i wish her all the best of health.Sorry grandma i will take more time to go visit you.

After that we went to 3 different places but fortunately its all within my neighbourhood or just somewhere near. Red packets collection was not really good but it does feel weird to collect red packets from them as i am a working adult already but since they insist of cuz i must oblige la lol.
First day flew by damn fast and i was damn tired. Turned in early for second day as we have to go to my uncle's house for visiting. I was at my uncle's house the whole day drinking and playing cards till we went for dinner and finally my uncle went with me to sing. I have been waiting so long to go with him cuz he is damn fun to be with. the most happening uncle that anyone could have. Had fun as my parents were there too and its rare that we go out like that. I really hope we can do this often.

Damn lazy to report to work today as i am still in holiday mood but no choice i have to survive.
Thanks to rainnie that i got to report to work on time as she gave me morning call but she burnt her finger in the process as she was curling her hair. Sorry rainnie!! I treat u to singing session today lol. CNY is gone in a flash and back to the normal routine life. But on the so called bright side i am off tomorrow!!!

Always Lingering On The Past

2009-01-25T01:51:00.004+08:00

These few days i have been doing loads of soul searching, finding the aim of my life and thinking back about the past. This is one of my bad habits because i always tend to think alot of what i went through before. I can say it has been a very very rough and bumpy ride but i must admit that it had been fun. Loads of fun.

Transforming from a nerdy geek to what i am today, i have never ever regret. I believe this are the stuff which made me street wise. Humans have to go through everything then its counted that u have live ur life before. As i am listening to the fast beat of the techno music from the past,

the memories just floods back everytime i listen to such songs. It has been crazy from the age of 16. Everything just gone in a flash. Those were the days. Sparks disco (located at takashimaya in the past), Wannabe (located at UE Square) and last but not least Mohd Sultan Club 3 and Club 7.

It is so ironic that i could remember every detail of those times as if it was just yesterday. If given me a chance,i would want to go through those times once again. But of cause its just all day dreaming. Those were the times when i went through so called brotherhood,betrayal,being used and getting close brushed with the law. Although friends now will tell me i am stupid but what's teenage life without learning all this? I feel i learnt alot from all the mistakes that i did and learnt to open my eyes wider to see who are the ones who will be there when you are in trouble.In the past , people want to talk about brotherhood? Maybe. But sadly, the world now has changed so much. Money rules the world now and being someone who is financially capable, you will have loads of friends. Trust me. Everyday you will recieve calls to ask you to go out for coffee,meals and drinking sessions.Without that,your phone will be as silent as the dead.

But i am also not implying that everyone is like that. There are nice friends who will stick with u through thick and thin no matter what. So maybe i am the unlucky one to get those so called brothers. Well everything is destined. It happens for a reason. As long as don't repeat the same mistakes and look forward. Life has so much to enjoy. The environment don't make human stress. Humans make themselves stress because of their actions. Like the saying goes, you reap what u sow. Be it good or bad, i strongly believe in that because i have seen it with my own eyes. So try to cherish and treasure those close to you and choose wisely. When you lose them there is no turning back. I have lost a couple of them and i really regret. Hope one day i can make it up to them. I am not an angel nor a devil. I can say i am pretty much got stuck in the middle.No one is perfect.If you want to seek perfection, heaven is the only place.

Last but not least the most important is your family. I have failed as a member of the family and i really hope i have the chance to make amends. They are the people who looked after u from the beginning of your life till this moment.Let them know u love them and say it out. Don't be like me. I love them all but i just cant bring myself to say that because i feel i got no right to say that.

Hope 2009 will be a better year for everybody but brace yourselves for a rough ride as the economy is damn bad. But as long as u keep being positive,things will work out. So Happy New Year everyone and wish u all great health.

Fast week.

2009-01-23T01:17:00.005+08:00

Went to korean restaurant on tuesday with rain and am glad she enjoyed the food. I am never a

fan of korean food untill i came to this restaurant at boat quay. I forgotten the name of the

restaurant but the food there is superb! And after going there for a few times i got to know jason,
who is the owner of the restaurant. He commented i keep having the same food when i am

always there and i should try the rest of the food. I told him i would try it someday and that

night i tried. We ordered the kimchi soup which is my all time favourite and the rice bowl with

the egg in the middle with different veggies all around and lastly the maggi noodles in some

special sauce with kimchi and pork. Its all damn nice la. Not forgetting the soju also all time fave!

After that went to the merlion to chat for awhile den head home already. Super tired. But over

all glad that she enjoyed herself. Looking forward to the next time!!! Finally CNY is coming and i

will get to see all my relatives soon. All the visiting and stuff is never too bored for me. Hope to

really prosper after the CNY. HUAT AR!!!

Sleepless Night

2009-01-20T02:20:00.002+08:00

Been drinking like there is no tomorrow. Reason? Nothing much. Just want to drink as much as i

can to forget whatever i am troubled with.Life is short. Extremely short. I can count myself to be

damn lucky to be what i am today. God has been good to me. He gave me perfect health and

everything. I am quite upset because one of my colleague got a tumour in his brain. He is only 23

years old. I feel that he should not deserve this kind of treatment from god because he is a really

nice guy. God should give that to me because i have been a failure. I really hope he can really

recover and just continue to live in this superb world. I have done too many mistakes in the past

maybe thats why i am facing all the things now. Just one word KARMA. I strongly belive in that.

I am really trying so hard to be a better person now. Hope i am doing enough to achieve that.

Today someone is upset and i am damn heart pain because i just don't want to see her so upset.

Although i don;t know what problems she have but i just don't want to see her like that. It hurts

so much.Maybe i am drunk now but i really feel this way. i am always like that when i am drunk

just cant control my emotions. But thats the only way i can release. Hope everything will be ok

for her and as long as she is happy i am happy. Good night everyone.

Tiring sunday

2009-01-18T23:55:00.005+08:00

Finally got my off day after working for 12 days straight and that is damn tiring!! But the day

just passed in a flash and i have to work again tomorrow sianz!! Just got back from soccer and it

feels damn good to be running after a month of not exercising at all. I seriously got to get back

my fitness soon. Hope i can go jog at least 3 times a week. Been looking through my old pics and i

found this picture at the top when i am so tan and fit and i feel damn sad lol . Can u find me?

But the feedback which i got was i look better now and that picture i look so malay lol. And

one of my ex colleague keep saying that i look like a fillipino ( u noe who u r) and she keeps

disturbing me when she sees fillipino . Got to keep back in shape la if not can't find any girlfriends

already. So got to go run more and eat less but drinking is ok!!! muahahahahaha .

Going back to the soccer game just now we lost 4-2 to this ang mo team and it was quite

disappointing . But i believe our team Xinmin Spiders will bounce back from defeat as we are

beginning to gel more as a team. However great company to be with as they are the craziest

and fun bunch of people i have ever known. the main culprit for spoiling the game today was the

referee as he seems more baised to the ang mos. But no choice la we are not professional so got

to take it down like a man. Really looking forward to Chinese New Year so that i can see my

relatives once again. Time flies like the wind. I have to cherish everything around me when i still

can. Looking forward to this coming friday as its zouk time again whahahhaah more booze!!!!!!

Haunted by the past

2009-01-18T14:15:00.000+08:00

People from different walks of life have each of their own past. As for mine,its not as glamourous as it can be.
I had a very weird dream last night. I dreamt of this guy from the past who taught me all the wrong stuff.
For some reasons i went MIA on him to stop all the nonsense and to start afresh in life.
I dreamt i saw him somewhere and he asked me to go drink .
Den as we were drinking he suddenly got agitated and started to stab me with broken beer bottles.
It was so real that i could even remember the blood and the pain from the cuts. I managed to run away and i woke up suddenly.
End of the dream?
Not really. My heart was pounding damn fast but i managed to calm myself down before going back to sleep.
Guess what?
I went straight back to the dream. Its like watching disc 2 of a movie lol.
But anyway in this second part i saw him in hand cuffs escorted by policeman and i was like quite happy that he got what he deserved.
BUT i was completely shocked when i saw the myself in the papers that i was killed by this idiot.
I woke up again and this time with sweat and heavy pounding from the heart.
I know this may be just a dream but its soooo real. Hope that i am not dreaming about the future.

Starting To Blog

2009-01-17T16:19:00.000+08:00

I have tried to blog twice before and failed to update regularly as i would have wished.
BUT i must do it this time because even my brother is blogging i must not lose out right? lol
Actually just wanna have an outlet for me to vent my frustrations and record my daily life.
2008 was a very very bad year for me and i hope 2009 will be better. New year new start.
My new year resolution? TIME TO LOSE WEIGHT! People keep telling me i FA FU la sibei sad lol and i am winnie the pooh to someone whahaha. So its time to do something about it before i cant even fit into my working pants. So got to cut down drinking and do more exercise!!